Remains Of Love...

Those silent nights, those screaming days,

piercing my soul in 1000 big ways.

How many times I wrote to you?

I wrote down my emotions & they seem to be few.

Everytime I live, I just want you,

but you melt yourself & drip like a dew.

10 months till date, I’m away from you,

I can’t think of anyone better & new.

Give me a reason why you left me?

Give me as many you have, one, two & three.

Do you have someone better than me?

What is the reason that you left me so free?

Was it my action that hurt you so bad?

You dropped me like a burnt corn & let me go mad.

Ask the mornings, don’t I miss you?

 Literally speaking, I feel déjà vu.

Ask the nights, it has seen me crying,

Slowly in my blanket, my emotions dying.

I write you a text, assuming it’ll breathe life in my emotions,

Not letting them die, which is a false notion.

But still with hopes of you returning back,

I stuff my dead emotions in my torn life-sack.

They fall apart & get scattered on the ground

 I throw my heart out to gather them around.

I know you’re stubborn like a grease-on-silk stain,

Time is not lost & nothing’s gone in vain.

Standing still, I’m awaiting your return,

Foliage turned ash of a dead French fern.

Come back my love, look my heart is so weak,

Don’t cut it across & roast it like a steak.

My love was no deal with terms & condition,

You put down the seal & you get the recognition.

I let my dignity weigh down for you,

letting my ego get skewed on barbeque.

With no dead hopes, I allow myself to say,

may you get the desired, profoundly I pray.

Now being self aware & minimizing the drama,

Slyly rubbing salt on my wounds & living back the trauma.

I can’t pretend to be sick with a headache or stomachache,

Now I can’t pretend because my pretentions will look fake.

I’ve spent my life alone, walking on dark roads to random places,

And later you won’t find me because I’ll be lost in those dark traces.

**I just want to say, that I love you with my true heart but by the time you realize my true love, i'd have been turned into ashes...!

with Love, from Love, for Love,

-a.p. (17/10/11)

In The Spirit World.

I was walking on a path between Heaven & Hell; My head bowed low & I heard a bell.

I slowly raised my head & tried looking through; far till the horizon, I could see nothing but sky blue.

I kept walking straight, neither left nor right; Hell was black & Heaven was white.

Gates were closed, no souls could I see; no Angel in disguise, no Devil on tree.

All of a sudden, I heard a strange voice; which asked me to halt & make a wise choice.

Confused & bewildered, I screamed, “Anybody there?” ; something in white robe, walked towards me in flare.

My senses were awakened & I was bathed in water Holy; I was taken to ‘Hall of Rest’ & I was put to rest slowly.

Few minutes later, when I woke up to a pleasant smell; I was shown Eden Garden & the bad Satan’s Hell.

All of a sudden, words reach my ears, “you’ve committed sins & you should be punished with fears.”

“Choose out of this – ‘Rebirth’ or ‘Hell’?”; 50 years of Mankind or 5000 Hell-years, you tell!”

A hand came from somewhere & held my wrist light; made me peep in Hell & my soul was cold & fright.

Ugly, dirty, deformed. Hell was full of these; The Hand caressed my soul & warmed down my freeze.

A High-Spirit whispered, “If you choose rebirth, you’ll be choosing a Holy chance; to do good on earth, in reality & not in trance!”

“Yes, you’ll be punished, but not like that in hell; now make a prude decision, it’s time for you to tell.”

I chose to take rebirth & the Spirits were all smiling; They started updating my records & punch in my filing.

“Go you sinner go, go wash off your sins; suffer & we’ll come to take you, so clean your deeds & rinse.”

“Note this down strictly, do good to all being; spread love, knowledge & peace & we Spirits will be seeing.”

“Compromises & Sacrifices is the root punishment in your fate; live it to the fullest & we’ll mark you up-to-date.”

“You’ll be born as ‘Anil’, meaning full & in abundance; surprises will be bestowed, beyond your imagination, in redundance.”

Way back from behind, a Spirit in 7^th Realm rose; walked towards me & Blessed me on my nose.

“Go my child, go, you’ll do good to all men, you’ll be born as gay & you’ll be surrounded by women.”

Laughed in bounty, all Spirits & me; time had come, to sign the ‘Treaty of Destiny’.

What more should I write, I remember only this; until my Mother gave me Birth & I sought bliss.

Love All & Spread Smiles!

-a.p.

Lovely Fights with Him : Sweet Memories!

{Remembering those tiny cute little fights we had}



Our fight on, He purposely not answering my call & then calling me back.


Our fight on, when He calls me & I keep asking him the same thing on track.


Our fight on, making Him wait long for me on the station or by the sea.


Our fight to zero down on Barista or CCD.


Our fight on my au lait Mocha & His Hot Chocolate Brownie.


Our fight on He being a dull suburban & me a glittering townie.


Our fight on that soft square cushion on the couch.


Our fight on me acting chic when the cane pricks my bum & I muttering Ouch..!


Our fight on small sips & big bites, in our large cups & plates.


Our fight on who’ll pay the bill. The bill of “our beautiful date.”


Our fight on who’ll hold my bag though He had his sacked on his shoulders.


Our fight to keep each other safe from Mumbai Traffic & RTO Bolders.


Our fight to hold each other’s finger & then slowly arms.


Our fight to have a light snack or pricey dinner in charms.


Our fight on louse budgeting & laze cost cutting.


Our fight on he bavarding & me completely mouth shutting.


Our fight on me agreeing Him to bear all my expenses.


Our fight to build around each other protective love fences.


Our fight on knitting those golden dreams of “Ours.”


Our fight on cuddles, we would be giving each other in showers.


Our fight on who’ll embrace whom in each other’s arms.


Our fight on me telling him, “be a cool man”, you look like a scarecrow in farms.


Our fight on me not seeking time for His shopping.


Our fight on me squeezing time for other things to go hopping.


Our fights on He asking me, “what will I do, if He dies?”


That time, me saying nothing but tears in my deep eyes.


I never thought so, that our fights will be ending.


Building deep cavities in our relationship, not worth mending.






With Love for Him,


-a.p. (14thOct,11)